How to Handle Mean People

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1 comment   |   Emotions

When you first go big in business, at home, or anywhere in life, you may be surprised when your good intentions are met by crazy angry encounters from random people. YES, IT HAPPENS! I was surprised many years ago when this kept happening and tried my best to be understood because “surely if they knew there was a misunderstanding, they would like me.”
 
Sometimes, people are simply committed to being angry and creating a bitter world around them to support their belief of the difficulty of life or unfairness of a situation. LET THEM BE. Allow them to be teachers to you of having compassion, setting boundaries, and keeping on course without distraction.
Mean woman
 
If you have any sense of integrity to yourself and do not give into people-pleasing, you will inevitably encounter craziness from others who do not match your vibration. When it occurs, will you choose to hold your vibration high, or will you lower it to appease the un-appeasable or go into battle with them?
 
TEACH YOUR CHILDREN HOW TO HANDLE MEAN PEOPLE
When you address relationships with your children, they grow up to be confident adults with healthy coping patterns.
 
Today, I shared with my girls that not everyone will like their mommy and some people will do and say angry things to hurt us. I taught them that this is a normal thing that happens to everyone and it is ok to feel sad for a little bit but then it is good to say “goodbye” to people who have a hard time being kind and go be with people who are kind.
 
My 6-year-old was still concerned about someone not liking her mommy, so I assured her there will ALWAYS be more people who like me than hate me. As an illustration, I showed her behind-the-scenes my Facebook account. She got to compare sizes between a short list of blocked people who had aggressively crossed boundaries and a long list of friended people who I interact with online.
 
“Wow, mom! A lot of people like you!” she exclaimed and she felt better about the mean people being gone.
confident girl
 

I AM GRATEFUL MY PARENTS HELPED ME BUILD A CONFIDENCE FOUNDATION STARTING IN MY CHILDHOOD

I regularly have conversations with my 6- and 8-year-old kids about interacting with people. Here are some things we talk about: 

1. Regularly ask each child, “Who loves you?” and have them generate a mental list of who loves them. My kids include relatives, friends, and deity in this list.
 
2. Express regularly, “I love being your mommy” and “I am so happy you are my daughter!” I mention some of the things I love about them and make sure to vary it up at each conversation.
 
3. Normalize emotions and show them how to be resilient by pointing out people or situations in my life when people are kind to me or unkind to me. “I feel sad they did that. Sometimes people do mean things. I am still an amazing person, and I like me.”
 
I’m sure I will be challenged at new levels of interactions as I continue to grow personally and professionally. But so far, I’ve learned combining compassion with boundaries protects me, my family, and my business, and it allows others space to continue on their own journeys to learn the lessons that will lead them to their highest good.
  1. Rafael Costa12-07-16

    my dad is like that !!!!! he is mean and does not trust anyone with anything only my little sis which is 7 years old he is super stupid and racist

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